Do you see yourself as a victor or a victim? Predator or prey, wolf or sheep, winner or loser? The choice is yours in life, and business and your mindset will determine your outlook – which do you choose? It is easy to feel like a victim. There are so many things out of our control; world events unfold at lightning speed, hazards are everywhere, and everything moves too fast. Sometimes, we choose to be victims and then wonder why we are unsuccessful. Victors make things happen. Victims let things happen to them. Which do you want to be?
The first step to conquering our inner victim is to adopt the victor’s thought pattern.
We must stop moaning and complaining about how tricky business and life can be. Instead of seeing factors that prevent our success, we can look for opportunities that create it. We can replace complaints with positive actions and play like the winners, choosing to control our destiny. Many people succeed in every climate, thrive during challenging times, and see every obstacle as a new adventure. We can be victors when we slay that inner victim.
I once had a coach who described each of us as having a stupid and intelligent version of ourselves inhabiting the same body. And every day, no matter how hard our wise version tries to quash our foolish self, silly me is always knocking at the windows, trying to get in. The same applies to our inner victim and victor. We each have an inner victim who wants to blame the world for our results, or lack thereof, and we also have a victor who takes control and makes our dreams come true. Every day we get to choose which versions of ourselves show up.
Our victim mentality has many reasons things are not quite what we want them to be. There are plenty of people and events to blame. The world is full of many distractions; how can we succeed? There are fires, floods, wars, famines, injustices, dangers, and obstacles everywhere. We weren’t born into the right family, body, time, opportunity, income level, or society. Governments and weather are unpredictable. Life is hard. These things are all true – to some extent. They need not stand in our way unless with let them.
Our victor thinks very differently than our victim. She doesn’t blame other people, circumstances, or events for her results and satisfaction with them. And, when the world throws us curveballs, lemons, or disasters, we react with aplomb. Every curveball is an opportunity for a home run, lemons make great lemonades, and disasters often create new opportunities. And we know it! We don’t sit in our empty story wondering why no customers show up. We make a change, act, find out what it takes to succeed, and make it happen.
When we become the victor, we know our results come from thinking, planning, and actions.
Events don’t alter our results, only our plans as we adjust and react accordingly. When forces seem to conspire against us, we turn them into opportunities. We hold ourselves accountable for our goals, actions, and results. We don’t let ourselves off the hook with excuses. We do what we plan, and when we slip, we get back up and start again.
We know we’re responsible for our results, experiences, and journey, and we gladly accept that sacred duty to ourselves. When we fall, we get up, brush ourselves off and continue? Years ago, my son fell and injured himself while no one was home. He lay in the driveway for a few minutes, wondering who would save him, and then realized no one would show up and treat him miraculously. So, he picked himself up and called me to ask how to treat his scraped knee. We are all responsible for what life brings us, and accepting that no one is to blame or is coming to save us is the key to success. When a 12-year-old innately knows this is true, we all know it. This week, and most weeks, choose to conquer your inner victim and let your victor rise and shine!
